We got up in the morning and took the advice of the Tourist Information guy and looked out our window first thing in the morning. We weren’t encouraged, as it was another low overcast day with light drizzle. In fact, we were kind of sick and tired of it because it made going into the mountains kind of pointless. When we ate breakfast, the TV channel with all the cameras at mountaintops showed thick fog with light snow. So we made the decision to forgo our last chance at the mountains and instead visit Lucerne. So we took a two hour train ride over the Brunig pass to Lucerne where the weather was nicer – scattered clouds, no rain or snow. The scenery along the way is spectacular: the green mountain sides towering over deep blue lakes with high waterfalls and idyllic villages nestled into the country side. The train station at Lucerne is right in the heart of the city, and it’s just a short walk to the famous Kapellbrücke — the covered bridge across the Reuss river.

CHAPEL BRIDGE PLUS OLD TOWN EQUALS TOURIST NIRVANA

THE WATER TOWER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BRIDGE NOW HAS A GIFT SHOP.

We crossed the bridge over to the oldest part of town and admired the paintings on the bridge along the way. Taking a break from gawking at the scenery, the women did some shopping while the men hung out, got bored, and went in search of the women who were in some extremely trendy store. Then it was time for more shopping! Eventually, even the women tired of shopping, or the male whining that accompanied it, and we moved back to admiring the town again. The funWife and I had spent a couple of nights in Lucerne back when we took our pre-kid trip to Europe, and it’s kind of neat to look back and see we took a lot of pictures at the same spots then and now. Not neat enough for me to scan the pictures in and show you the contrast, so you’ll just have to take my word for it.

I ESPECIALLY ADMIRE THE FREE WATER AND NOT JUST ALL THE FANCY PIPES AND STUFF

I enjoy just strolling around the old cities and towns of Europe. I can go hiking in the Rockies and get almost as good scenery as the Alps, but there is nothing in America to compare to the old cities of Europe. So of course the female half of The Murphy Family wanted to celebrate the architectural glories of old Europe by shopping. The male half decided to sit that out, and did so alongside the river running through Lucerne with one studying the ornamentation of the nearby buildings in detail while taking too many pictures and the other just sitting there. Eventually the two genders rejoined and we crossed the river Reuss again, this time over the Spreuerbrücke. Where the chapel bridge has (mostly happy) paintings depicting the history of Lucerne, the mill bridge has a series of paintings titled Dance of Death so you can imagine the contrast. Thankfully, while the paintings depict death meeting people of all walks of life, not one of them has death meeting a tourist.

Sometimes you just get lucky, and this was one of them. I wanted to go to the history museum, and the Fruit of the Murphy Loins wound up enjoying it. It is the original mathom house, a hoard of objects collected over the centuries and mostly displayed in no particular order. There were the suits of armor and the collection of medieval weapons I was looking for, but cheek by jowl with them were old suitcases and sewing machines. There was a collection of Milanese shields captured from the Burgundians 800 years ago; there was a collection of Roman artifacts dating back 2 millenium (mainly trash to be quite honest, but what trash!); there were artifacts much older dating back to the earliest inhabitants; there was a toy collection from the 40s and a special display area dealing, as near as I could tell, with Swiss rock bands from the sixties. There was a coin collection I must have spent a good 15 minutes absorbed in before I realized I could spend the rest of the day investigating without seeing it all.

Most of the objects are poorly exhibited, a jumble of stuff behind steel mesh bars. But what made it fun for the Fruit were the interactive guides. When we entered, the funWife immediately asked the docent if the displays included English because she wasn’t going to plunk down her hard earned cash, even if it was vacation money, to try to puzzle out oddities labeled in French and German. No problem came the reply, we just program these hand held guides to display English, you scan the bar code on every display with them, and you can read the English text displayed about the object. So we had fun with them from the start, and when we got all the way to the top of the Arsenal (the museum is located in the old city arsenal), the Fruit discovered the guides also were programed for treasure hunts and similar games. This allowed the fearless leaders to caucus comfortably in comfy chairs and plan without interruption.

Since my choice of the History Museum had gone over so well, there were no grumbles when we set out to walk along the old city walls. So it was back over the bridge and a walk along the river to the wall. The tower closest to the river was closed, so it was up the big hill to the next tower. The scene was now bucolic; on the outside of the wall, we left the hustle and bustle of the city behind, and instead stood on a verdant hillside, with cows placidly grazing inside the electric fence. I discovered it was electrified with I put my hand on it as I climbed the hill and got a thrilling tingle. Good thing I didn’t touch two wires. And that’s a couple of things I like about Europe – no warning signs, you’re just expected to watch out for yourself, and you can stand in a field in the middle of a great city and admire a herd that has grazed in that field for, what, going on a millennium! We were there in summer and the climb was hot and tiring; the field itself looked a bit tuckered out and waiting for cooler days, but you should see the spot in glorious springwhen everything is fresh and new.

“COME ON, OLD MAN” IS NOT PARTICULARLY INSPIRING

Eventually, and with much panting, we made it to the top of the hill and the base of the tower which is open to the public. The Fearless Leaders briefly conferred and handed over the cameras to the Fruit so that they could take them to the top and make a record of the trip. We had climbed every tower in every castle we visited; we had climbed up and down the hillside Lausanne was built on; at this point of the vacation, we simply decided this far and no farther. Plus there was a park bench at the base of the tower and we didn’t want it to go to waste. So with admonishments to “Take Your Time!” still ringing in their ears, the Fruit made the climb to the top and took some outstanding photos.

VIEW FROM LUCERNE CITY WALL

ANOTHER VIEW FROM LUCERNE CITY WALL

Eventually the Fruit returned and we continued along the wall. Past the next tower we came to tennis courts blocking the way, so we had to enter the third tower along, but we didn’t come out the other side. No, we climbed up to the top of the wall and continued our walk there. This was about the maximum excitement I could take (have I mentioned I have heightaphobia?) but the choice was to give up or continue on. I admit I wondered how many watchman were lost in adverse conditions from the top of the wall, which had the original parapet on the outside and a modern handrail on the inside. Just when I was comfortable way up there, the wall started down hill and took my confidence with it. Passing people coming the other way was torture as I had to get all the way over against the insignificant handrail, and when the rest of the Murphy Family went up in another tower I had to duck in and wait it out in the enclosed space. Still, the view was great and eventually we came to end of the wall and the stairs down. I was glad I got to walk on top of the wall and I was glad to get down.

WOULD THAT ALL SUCH LOYALTY AND BRAVERY WERE HONORED

We set off for the Löwendenkmal or Lion Monument, dedicated to the Swiss guards who died in at Tuileries Palace rather than stand aside during the French Revolution. Swiss mercenaries were double good – they fought well and they stayed bought. We didn’t have a detailed map but we found our way there with our usual skill at dead reckoning and attention to concentrations of tourist buses. The monument itself is quite affecting and worth the trip.

THAT’S NO MOVIE STAR, THAT’S MY DAUGHTER

Time was beginning to press since the trains leaving for Interlaken were two hours apart so we skipped the glacier village and the panorama that were nearby and instead made our way to The Hofkirche (Abbey Court Church). Our last time in Lucerne we only saw the outside, and I wanted to see the inside. By this time we were all tired and the rest of the family clearly decided that humoring me would be course of action that let us plunk our butts down on the train the fastest. I could spend hours just recounting the glories of the entrance, but instead I’m just providing a picture of the doors with another work of art. Believe me, the entire front of the church is exquisite, and I have a whole series of pictures of the entrance that I will look at and get all warm and glowy on the inside, but then the inside is also another stunning work of art. We had enough time to devote to seeing the church, but no more, so after we satiated ourselves on beauty, we hustled back to the train station so we could make a visit to the McClean (the cleanest public restroom, and the most expensive, I’ve ever peed in) and then board our train for the ride back to Interlaken.

We wanted to make our last night a good one, and so on the way back from the train station we would stop at each restaurant, read the menu, discuss if there was something there all four of us wanted to eat. We finally settled on one restaurant, Des Alpes, but after a long wait for any service, we left and started the process all over. One thing about European restaurants – dogs are welcomed, even encouraged. We were a bit quicker about deciding on the next place, and so we had a fabulous meal at the Petit Casino. I don’t know that Fruit of the Murphy Loins had eaten at such an elegant restaurant before, and all I can say is kids, hope you liked it because I doubt you’ll ever eat at such an elegant restaurant with me again.

Tags: Lucerne